Just Tammy

And I liked it. I know it's wrong and he'll never be mines. This saddens me. As usual I will be left alone...

I can't sleep tonight....I'm exhausted and sleepy but every time I try to shut down my mind goes crazy. When it comes to men I simply go for the unattainable....kinda hoping it will workout but the reality is....I know it never will. Not that they're out of my league bit I should avoid them at all cost. Their track record alone should make me stay clear. But here I am flirting it up with another attainable. It's a horrible cycle which makes me question my mental state. Why do I do this? What am I afraid of? Don't I deserve more? I can answer that.....Fuck yeah I do but I stay on this horrible path. It's not my fetishes...even there I'm leery. What the fuck is wrong with me? 35 going on 16....simply not cute. I'm stuck and I simply want off this ride.